A lighthouse serves as a beacon of hope in a violent storm. A lighthouse sheds light on our worries and troubles, and brings us joy and peace. Therefore,in each Heartsong issue, I will include an article, which will help to guide you through the dark and troubled times, or lighten and brighten your heartand life in a special way. In today’s Lighthouse article, I’ll share five tips to assist you in defeating loneliness, replacing it with inner peace, and finding strength to bring more fulfillment into your life.

Serenity in the Midst of Sadness: Five Tips to Assist you in Combatting Loneliness
(Part One of Two)

By the time you’ll be reading this newsletter, it’ll be Superbowl Sunday here in the U.S. Many people will spend at least part of the day gathering with friends and family, to share good food, fun and game-day festivities. But for many people, the opportunity to share their days and their lives with loved ones is impossible. Perhaps you’re one of those people, or know someone who is?

Many of us have loved ones who are far away from us, sick, or who have transitioned home. These facts cause many to live lonely lives, often filled with deep sadness and even depression. Often the dark days of Winter compound these emotions, making life feel quite unbarable at times.

During times in my own life, in spite of having family and friends whom I love dearly, I have suffered the crippling effects of loneliness. Moving through that emotion can be very scary, and is a process that requires gentleness and plenty of self-care. As someone who has been deeply lonely at times, my heart aches to see so many beautiful souls going through their days with heavy hearts and feeling empty inside due to their own loneliness. Therefore, in this first of a two-part series, I’d like to share five tips with you which can assist you in moving through loneliness, and discovering inner peace and a source of inner strength that you may not even realize you possess. I encourage you to see if these tips resonate with your own heart, and give them a try.

• Honor the emotion… before we can move past something that stands in our way, whether it be an emotion, a limiting belief or some other type of seeming limitation, we must first acknowledge it is there. For instance, imagine that you’re walking along the street and suddenly a river appears out of nowhere,blocking your path. The water is rushing too furiously for you to simply walk through it. Therefore, you must acknowledge that, yes, there is in fact a river in front of you that you must find away around. It’s the same with loneliness; before you can find a way to successfully navigate through the turmoil,sadness and fear the emotion causes for you, first you must acknowledge that you do feel lonely, and that it does negatively impact your life. Make a list,either mentally or preferably a written list, acknowledging how your loneliness is effecting your life. Are you feeling sad, fearful, anguished, angry,rejected? Whatever you’re feeling as a result of being lonely, write it down, and acknowledge it to yourself. Then you can successfully move forward and find a way out of the loneliness.
• Allow yourself to grieve. This goes along with the first point about acknowledging the emotions you’re experiencing. If you feel like you want to cry,then allow yourself to do so. I’m not suggesting that you stay in bed for days on end, but if you have emotions bubbling to the surface that you haven’t allowed yourself to release, then find a healthy way to release them. This is an important step, because you’re not only acknowledging your loneliness,but you’re honoring yourself by releasing emotions that are keeping you sad, fearful and which are just plain unhealthy to be carrying around inside for prolonged periods of time. It’s okay to be sad… release your built up emotions in a healthy manner. You’ll feel better as a result.
• Move through the loneliness, literally. As crazy as it may sound, physical movement, such as dance, yoga, arobic exercise, stretching, etc, is a wonderful tool to help us to move through emotions that are making us stagnant or causing us pain. Have you ever gotten really angry about something and went on a brisk walk afterwards? Did it help? The same principle applies here. Make time in your day for some physical movement, whether it be a pleasant morning walk, a jog around the block or some yoga at home. Not only can it help you to feel a sense of release, but it can also help you to appreciate your body,and give you a sense of freedom and liberation thanks to the physical movement. A wonderful program I’ve found to be very helpful in my own life is Energy Dancing by Silvia Hartmann. Check it out if it resonates.
• Seek out support systems which resonate with your heart and your intuition. Whether it be a coach, counselor, minister, or another helping professional,please find someone who can support you through the process. There are a lot of wonderful people out there who would love to be of assistance to you, listen openly, and show you the love and kindness you desire and deserve as you work towards finding inner peace. Reach out and connect with people with whom you resonate, and you’ll know when you find someone with whom you’re comfortable and who you trust to share openly about your situation. Sometimes just having someone to talk to, who listens objectively, holds the space for growth and shows you compassion along the journey, is a tremendous step towards combating your loneliness.
• Write a letter to Spirit. This step deserves a complete article, but here I’ll just summarize this beautiful and powerful process. Many of us believe in a higher power, whether we call it God, Goddess, Spirit, etc. Many of us consider this higher power to be a loving, benevolent figure, whom we can trust and who will support us. Writing a letter to Spirit combines the power of the written word and the alliance and assistance of the God of your understanding.

  To write this letter, first decide whether you wish to hand write your letter or type it. I encourage you to do whatever feels best for you personally.

  Choose paper or stationary that you find pretty and / or appealing. Use a color you find soothing and beautiful.

  Then begin writing as if you’re writing to a best friend who will listen openly and support you with love and compassion. Write down your feelings, hopes, dreams and desires. Tell Spirit (the God of your understanding) where you feel you most need assistance in your life. For instance, if you’re having trouble with the fourth step (finding someone to talk to with whom you resonate), ask for assistance in finding the right person or people. You may want to ask for assistance in decreasing your sadness, deepening your peace, or feeling the presence of your higher power.

  This is your own personal letter to Spirit, so be honest and open, and know that you are deeply loved and cherished by Source.

In the second part of this article, I will provide five more tips to assist you in finding peace in the midst of loneliness, and moving through it into a more fulfilled and joyful state of being. If I can be of support on your journey, please feel free to contact me.

HOPE AND HEALING